


Commander's past and present

by Mymindispriceless



Category: Clarke Griffin - Fandom, The 100 (TV), clarke griffin & commander lexa - Fandom, clarklexa - Fandom, clexa - Fandom, commander lexa - Fandom
Genre: Clarke Griffin - Freeform, Clexa, F/F, Polis, The 100 - Freeform, clarke griffin/commander lexa - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-04-11
Updated: 2015-12-23
Packaged: 2018-03-22 07:01:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,491
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3719554
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mymindispriceless/pseuds/Mymindispriceless
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Clarke is on her way to Polis and finds a new ending that she never expected</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Sunset to Polis

One, this number meant nothing to me until today. One month, one person and one goal since the defeat at Mout. Weather. The thought of the betrayals and sufferings because of me sends chills down my spine. I start counting my foot steps as a game, as if someone will come along and play with me at any moment. I find a spot to spend the night and some wood for a fire and shelter. The sun soon disappeared over the mountains, I always imagined that my thoughts and feelings go with the sun and let me forget everything that I have done.

“ _Mount. Weather is gone_ ” I have to say it over and over to myself to make it seem real. I killed everyone, I watched them all die, in a weird twisted I was glad they all were.

Waking up the next morning I went out and hunted for food and water like I do every morning. But this morning was different, I felt followed and watched. It was like they came to my game a lot later than I expected. I looked at the trees like they could tell me if someone was following me or if I was going crazy. I got a squirrel for breakfast, not my favorite meal but it is better than a small bird.

It was already noon, I felt my feet give out and so did my breakfast. I went and got some berries for a quick snack. A twig cracked behind me. I grabbed my knife and quickly turned around to see a grounder, but not any grounder, Lexa’s guard.

“Clarke?" He looked and sounded like he sees a ghost, he might as well be because everything still doesn't seem real to me

"H-how did you find me?"

"It was easy with the trail that you left behind. Why are you out here? And how are you alive?" His voice was shaking and scared

I hesitated on my answer because I felt like I was being recorded for evidence, "I left my camp, I killed all the Mount. Weather people, I left because I couldn't bare seeing everyone's faces as they look at me, so I am baring the pain by myself" Saying that out loud made me realize that I needed someone to talk to, someone other than myself

"You killed all of the-the Mount. Weather people? Kids and women a-and everyone? I'm sorry Clarke but I underestimated you and so did the commander. She won't believe her eyes when you come back with me" He seemed sad and joyful like he dreamed of this moment more than once

I put my knife back in my holster and started back to my camp "I'm sorry but I am not going there, I'm trying to find my way to Polis, if you could lead me there then I will get on my way" I started to pack up then he came over to help me like he was not phased by anything I said. "Thank you" 

"You are wanting to go to Polis?"

"Yes, I want a fresh start with new faces" Even if I did make it to Polis, I would characterize everyone by all of my friends, even though they hold great animosity towards me.

"You were going the general direction, except a little more to the left than you should, Just follow the way the sunsets and you will find it, it should take you three more days, a week at most." He was about to say something else, but then he got hesitant, waiting for someone to cheer him on to speak.

I felt this urge to ask him what it wrong because I knew what it is like to wanting to talk to someone and nobody listens other than yourself. I asked him if he was okay and he went on about how he misses his wife and daughter in Polis but he still loves fighting for the commander and Polis. The thing that intrigued me the most about his story was his passion for his daughter. The thing that I thought about the most during his story was my dad, looking at my watch every few seconds trying to remember every detail of his face and all of the silly faces he would do towards me. I would smile and laugh a little remembering everything I can about my him while rubbing off the little dirt I had on my watch.

 After he got done talking about Polis and his family it had been a hour later. He left to go back to camp with what food he had left and I went on my way to Polis.

 It was the morning of the fourth day of my journey to Polis since I found the way. I got up and did my regular morning routine. While I was getting breakfast I got to thinking about how my old routine use to be every morning and afternoon at the camp. While I was thinking about my past it occurred to me that I was picking up twigs for breakfast. This was the first true time that I was glad nobody was watching me.

I noticed that when I followed where the sun sets, the forest got more and more less of a forest, as if it was being set free from this world. I wish i could join them but I know I have my own journey to complete first. After a few more hours of walking I came across a small girl, around 9 or 10 with a dress like clothing and no shoes and her hair was done in a way of some symbol saying she is not a threat. She noticed me way before I noticed her, she reminds me of a smaller version of Lexa and how she hides without showing any resentment at all. I was about to ask her if she knew where her parents were and she ran off into what was left of the forest. I tried to follow what trail she gave me to follow, they teach them early while I still have to learn the hardest way possible. After finding little twigs snapped and small leaves cut in half from her running I looked up to see a huge a wide open space filled with little huts/houses and people going every different direction like ants. 

I slowly walk to the opening while observing every little detail I can about this place from the outside. The first thing I noticed is the big palace like building behind all of the huts/houses. I was so memorized by this creation of a place that I didn't noticed the two huge guards right in front of me until I stopped day dreaming and came back to life.

"State your name" One of the guards said normally but it sounded like he was yelling

"My name is Clarke, Clarke Griffin" I knew then that I was being recorded by the guards and the few people that was hurdling around the gate starting at me

With a very serious tone in his voice, "We all agreed that none of your people will cross our part of the land and we will not cross your part, Why are you over here?" 

I became very worried and confused as to why he was telling me this, "What do you mean? We never made a deal with you all" At this point I was afraid he was going to kill me if I said one wrong word and because of that I would take my time replying to insure my survival for the next minute.

His tone became very frustrated with my response "We made a deal with you Mountain people and you all are back wanting more from us again! We will not tolerate it any longer!" The next thing I knew there were a couple more guys coming behind them with spires and bow and arrows.

I panicked, "No! Wait hold on! I'm not with the mountain men I promise! I'm from the sky!"

Out of nowhere everything and everyone become silent, as if the whole world heard a secrete of mine. After a few awkward moments of silents everyone started talking and whispering like I was still one of the mountain men.

One of the guards slowly started walking towards me, "You are Clarke of the Sky People?"

I was shocked as much as them because I had no clue that they knew me, who told them? "Ye-s I am, I am her, Clarke"

"I heard of you many times, I just thought you were not real. Please, please come in" He turned to the side to open the way towards Polis as he puts his swords as well as all of the other men. I never thought all of the houses would be here, or have this many people in it. So many children and women and some wounded grounders. I was still in shock over how glorious everything was, all of the houses, children, workers, the big palace. Camp Jaha doesn't compare to this place. The guard went over to get someone that I payed no attention to because Polis had my full attention.

"This is one of our leaders that keeps everything and everyone in line, she will show you around and show you where you will stay for the night" At the end of our little conversation we had he seemed to be a very strong character and a great choice for a guard, like Bellamy.

"This way please" She looked like she was in her mid thirties with a firm stance and strong-minded

I followed her as as she was pointing out all of the places,big and small, that they have made such as a school, hospital for the wounded, a garden, the butcher and a place for the kids to play. While I was walking with this woman showing me around and with my amaze face reaction the whole time a women accident bumps into me

"I'm sorry I didn't see you there" I barley grabbed her arm to make sure she was stable

"It is fi-" She looked up at me for the first time, she became very confused, "Who are you?"

I saw the confinement in her eyes "I'm Clarke, of the sky people"

She became very pale and didn't know what to say or ask, she looked at my intensely, "Clarke? The real Clarke?"

"The real Clarke? What do you mean the real Clarke?" I was to confused to ask anything else that came to me

She studied me for the longest time, "I heard of you, from my daughter, multiple times. I didn't really believe the stories she told me but know I'm second guessing my thoughts"

I became worried quickly about who her daughter was but I became more worried about the stories that her daughter has told her about me, "Who is your daughter?" I almost didn't want to ask that queston with the fear of the answer

"Lexa, the Commander"

I couldn't believe the answer, That one word just made me stiff with no words or movement in return. So many questions ran through my mind but none of them made sense, this didn't make sense. She was asking me questions but I couldn't hear her because of my mind wondering off into different places until finally she faded into my thoughts.

"Ma'am? Are you okay? Do you need help?" She sounded more concerned than what I am, which at this moment I didn't think was possible

"Yea, I'm fine,I'm fine" I was trying to reinsure her i was, but mostly myself, and even I couldn't do that

"Did you know Lexa?" She was almost excited yet very afraid of what I was about to say

"Yes, yes I di- I mean I do"

After all of the questions swarming my thoughts about Lexa I noticed I found myself already in the house I was staying at for the night. All I can think about is how I could miss Lexa's parents, did I forget she had parents? Did I think they were dead? Did I think that they left her? I felt ashamed of my self to assume anything about her parents and her real life outside of being a commander. I got into bed still thinking about every question I'm going to ask her mother in the morning. First starting with where is the rest of Lexa's family?


	2. Nomod Heda

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, sorry for not posting in the longest time but I have been busy and I thought this was dead but luckily it is not, thank you for waiting and I hope you enjoy this chapter!

It's early in the morning, I only had 4 hours of sleep. Why am I like this? I thought I was over Lexa, but this early morning thing has me guessing other wise. What else don't I know about Lexa? So many questions, luckily there's enough time. While I was exploring this house and how remarkable it is and how it is built is unbelievable. I start to see the sun come out and as soon as the sun comes out, so does everyone else. They all go to there assigned place and start where they left off from the next day. I exit my house and start walking around to see what Polis is truly like for the first time. Every house has a different feeling. You could tell the difference between all of them, if its decorations or who lives in it or who ever built it. I looked up to see the tall Palace and how beautiful it really is.

Everyone was staring at me the way I was staring at the Palace, surprised, shocked, and a little terrified. The real question is who lives in there? Is that where Lexa stay's when she's here? Who knows. All I know is that I need to find Lexa's mom. I need answers, what does she know? As I am staring blankly at this huge Palace I feel something brush my leg. When I looked down it was the same little girl that I saw in the woods. I got down on one knee to be face to face with her.

"Hi there, Do you remember me? From the woods yesterday?"

No answer, just staring at me like every other grounder does. I think that is their new way of saying hello that Lexa hasn't told me about, then again she hasn't told me anything about Polis. The little girl went away to this women and hide behind her. I start walking around looking in the woods hoping to see my people or even Lexa at this point. I spent the rest of the day exploring how kids spend their days playing in the dirt and making the funnest games out of random objects. The famers use handmade plows that are so unusual, but i have never planted a garden before. Mothers are also cooking because you could smell their food from far away. That's probably how the Mountain Men found them lets be honest.

"Heda? Do you know where Heda is?"

"Heda!"

"Yes! Do you know where she is?"

This women started at me in such confusion. I start thinking about how to say mother in Trigedasleng. I found a warrior standing post and I went to him knowing that he would know how to say Mother in their language.

"Excuse me"

"Yes Heda of Skaikru"

"Funny how I will never get use to hearing that, do you know how to say mother in Trigedasleng?"

"Nomon"

"Nomon of Heda, Thank you"

I kept on practicing the saying going back to Polis like it was my name

"Nomon? Mother of Heda?"

No one would look at me. I was wondering if it was because of how I looked or who I was. I went over to a group of women that were all talking about who knows what while their were cleaning clothes and staring at me in the process.

"Nomon of Heda?" They all stopped cleaning and looked at each other, then looked at me, one of them pointed to a rugged old version of all the houses in Polis.

"Nomon don der"

"Thank you, Mochof"

Walking to this old house gave me the chills and my heart started racing like it did in Mount Weather before Bellamy and I pulled the lever. I hope I won't regret this decision because she is the only real person that knows Lexa, and I can't lose her again. I knocked on what their version of a door is, next I heard a few things knocking around in there before the door barley peaked opened and she stood in the door way. She had wavy brown hair and brown eyes, she had this dress that had layers upon layers of different designs and fur of some sort of animal, a fox maybe?

"Hi" I held my hand out politely to shake hers but she just stared at it like it was nothing. "We meet yesterday? Well not entirely meet yesterday but you bumped into me, I don't know if you-"

"Yes, yes I remember. Clarke, right?"

"Clarke, yes, that is my name. You are the mother of Lexa, correct?"

She looked behind her into her house for a few seconds before slowly opening the door and stepping to the side. I walked in to see candles lit and rugs on the ground with two beds in the corner and pictures on the wall of this house that looked outstanding compared to what I have ever seen.  
"You have beautiful pantings, did you do these?"

"No I didn't, a boy here gave it to me for my birthday"

"He did a amazing job"

She was staring at me the whole time I was looking at her house, studying me up and down like she did the first time we bumped into each other.

"You truly are beautiful like she said"

I was caught off guard from what words came out of her mouth, "Lexa said that?"

She had a laugh that was more serious than Lexa herself, "Yes, Lexa did." There was a pause that lasted longer than I thought it did before she turned around to cleaning the dishes, "She has told me so many stories about you Clarke of the Sky People, many I did not believe myself"

The first question I wanted to shout out of my lungs and was at the tip of my tongue was if she is still alive. Of course she is. I mean someone would of told me already. Right? "She hasn't say anything about you or her family to me"

It got so quite that you could hear a pin drop in a middle of a grounder fight. "I could see why"

I didn't know if I should of said sorry for saying what I said or ask her what she meant, "I'm sorry ma'am, I didn't mean to-"

"No it is fine Clarke" She started to look over her shoulder to me but went back to her clean dishes. "I don't expect anything for Lexa after what I did to her"

I came here to get answers of questions, not get more unanswered questions. This plan was not my best.

"What did you do?" You could feel the smallest of wind blowing through the house from the outside, "It's not my place to say Clarke"

Of course, a answer to another unanswered question. "We have all done things that we had to do for the best of us in the end"

The silence in the air was getting more and more stiff with me standing there and I felt like it was time to leave, "I'm suppose to meet one of the guards in a few minutes so, I'm going to go now, if that is okay"

Lexa's mother turned around to face me and before I knew it I felt two arms around my waist, she was hugging me. "Thank you, so much" She held her hand out and shook it. When I shook her hand i felt something cold, metal like. "You're welcome, I will visit tomorrow" As I was walking out I looked in my hand that she shook and saw a key in the middle of my palm.

This key has a weird design on it, like a key to a old lock that i have never seen before, only in old books from 1940's, 200 years old. How does she have this key, most importantly, what does it go to? I saw in the distance, while I was staring at the key, a silhouette on top of the mountain that stood there for a few seconds and fell tumbling down the mountain until the body dropped in from of Polis's front gate. All I heard behind me was loud screams and people's feet running in the distance to their assigned house while I looked at this bloody body in front of me.

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry for any misspelled words. More will be coming soon! Thank you for reading this, I have many ideas but don't know how to properly put them into words! Any suggestions and advice will help. Thank you again!


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